More on why I'm doing this.

I realized I haven't explained why I am doing this, or what the deal is exactly behind 12 tries.

When confronted with something new, often my first chance is "I don't want to do that." I fear. I worry. I figure I'll be bad at something. Then--providing I am, which is what usually happens when you try something that you have never, ever done--I proceed to beat myself up over it repeatedly until I'm convinced I hate it.

But that happens with things I haven't yet tried, but based on past experiences, I will assume I don't like. Like knitting. I don't understand why I should do it when I can go out and buy a perfectly good Thing That Is Knitted, because I'm basing the fact that I can't knit on past issues of me having no craft skills whatsoever.

But that's not entirely true. Writing is an art...but it's really more a craft, I think. Cooking, which I love...is a craft. I think. What exactly is a craft, anyway? I will have to look it up.

(I am crafty. But not always in the appropriate ways. That is perhaps a discussion for another time.)

Some things, I will admit, I am not predisposed toward, genetically or otherwise, to be doing. I'm 5'8" and clumsy -- I'm not setting out to become a professional gymnast. I'm not advanced when it comes to math; I can barely calculate a tip.

I'm not going to try to defy reality, but I am going to try to get out of my comfort zone.

Because when I do, I surprise myself.

In 2005, I decided I would run a marathon. Prior to this, my attitude toward running was that I would run if someone chased me.

I don't entirely know why I did this -- it was in my head even before the New Year's Eve that I said I was going to go it. But I did. I did it with Team in Training, which got me trying something else new, which is fundraising. I exceeded my goal, and ran a marathon.

And now you can't fucking get me to stop running.

Maybe I'll cotton onto something I've tried. Maybe I won't. But it's at least time to give it some thought.

I'm tired of being scared of things I don't know.

5.5 days until 35.